UNK ROCKER

STILL LOUD.
HOME BY TEN.

Shirts, stickers & patches for lifers whose knees have filed a formal complaint.

  • SHIPS IN[X–Y] business days
  • RETURNS[RETURN POLICY]
  • FITSUnisex + women's cuts · size chart
  • PRINTED ON[BLANK BRAND] tees

THE GOODS

Tees, stickers & patches. Hover a tee to see the back.

THE ONE
UNK ROCKER THE COUCH TOUR LIVING ROOM ······ FRI KITCHEN ·········· SAT BED (EARLY) ······ SUN
[PRICE]

Comb-Over Skull Tee

The flagship. Unisex + women’s cuts.

CROWD FAVE
DOORS AT 7 BED BY 10
UNK ROCKER THE COUCH TOUR LIVING ROOM ······ FRI KITCHEN ·········· SAT BED (EARLY) ······ SUN
[PRICE]

Doors at 7, Bed by 10 Tee

Black tee. Unisex + women’s cuts.

RIOT GRRRL: BIFOCAL ERA
UNK ROCKER THE COUCH TOUR LIVING ROOM ······ FRI KITCHEN ·········· SAT BED (EARLY) ······ SUN
[PRICE]

Riot Grrrl: Bifocal Era Tee

Women’s + unisex cuts.

OI! MY BACK
UNK ROCKER THE COUCH TOUR LIVING ROOM ······ FRI KITCHEN ·········· SAT BED (EARLY) ······ SUN
[PRICE]

Oi! My Back Tee

Unisex + women’s cuts.

ANARCHY IN THE HOA
UNK ROCKER THE COUCH TOUR LIVING ROOM ······ FRI KITCHEN ·········· SAT BED (EARLY) ······ SUN
[PRICE]

Anarchy in the HOA Tee

Unisex + women’s cuts.

STILL HATE THE SYSTEM. ALSO MY KNEES. [PRICE]

Still Hate the System Patch

Sew it on the battle vest.

BEST GIFT
THIS VAN HASA MORTGAGE EARPLUGSARE PUNK OI! MY BACK × 5 [PRICE]

Sticker Pack (5)

Five stickers. Weatherproof vinyl [CONFIRM].

THIS VAN HAS A MORTGAGE [PRICE]

This Van Has a Mortgage Sticker

For the minivan. You know the one.

[PRICE]

Comb-Over Skull Sticker

Slap it on everything.

BUYING FOR AN OLD PUNK?

Not sure what they'd wear? Start with a kit. Not sure of their size? Go a size up. They've earned it. See the size chart.

The Starter Kit

Comb-Over Skull Tee + Sticker Pack. The safest bet for any old punk.

[PRICE]

The Battle Vest Kit

Still Hate the System Patch + Comb-Over Skull Sticker + This Van Has a Mortgage Sticker. No sizing required.

[PRICE]

HOW UNK ROCK ARE YOU?

Five questions. No wrong answers. Some embarrassing ones.

  1. 1.Do you stretch before shows?

  2. 2.Do you own more than one pair of earplugs?

  3. 3.Have you ever left before the encore to beat traffic?

  4. 4.Is your favorite band tee older than some of your coworkers?

  5. 5.Do you have “a guy” for your knees?

0 of 5 answered

UNK OF THE MONTH

Send us one photo from back then and one from now, in the merch. Best pair goes on the wall.

SUBMIT YOURS →
THIS MONTH
[THEN PHOTO]

THEN

[NOW PHOTO, IN THE MERCH]

NOW

[NAME], [CITY]First show: [BAND], [YEAR]
[THEN PHOTO]

THEN

[NOW PHOTO, IN THE MERCH]

NOW

[NAME], [CITY]First show: [BAND], [YEAR]
[THEN PHOTO]

THEN

[NOW PHOTO, IN THE MERCH]

NOW

[NAME], [CITY]First show: [BAND], [YEAR]
Back in my day, merch came out of a trash bag at the side of the stage.
Unk. Still front row.

WHO'S UNK?

Unk Rocker is merch for the ones who were there: the basement shows, the busted vans, the ears that never quite stopped ringing. Whether you were in the pit, on the stage or running the zine, this is for you.

We still hate the system. We also have strong opinions about lumbar support. Everything here is designed by lifers and shipped to your door, no trash bag required.

Mosh responsibly.